NOT SO "Sweet Emotion"

Last night, I felt a new emotion as a Mommy so fierce, so striking; it almost overwhelmed me. I am choosing not to go into a much detail as I have with cherished friends about this happening here, but more so channel into that "emotion" I had as a MOTHER. 

I am a mother that feels incredibly deep emotional ties to my children.  I now realize that C and I are fighting to maintain the innocense of our children in a world that wants to strip it away all too quickly. This world wants nothing more than to suck us up and spit us out forever damanged by it's effects. I, was one of those unfortunate ones that dealt with the worlds ugly reality. Not only do I pray that my children wear the armor of God, but I pray that I can help effectively coat that armor through my parenting that will build my children up into adults that are in this world and not of it. How tough is our job? The toughest job ever!

While venting to a handful of amazing women, one of my friends A said, "We are there to protect our children...and if that means the lioness comes out...so be it. No one else is gonna do it...."  She is right. No one else will protect our young like we can as parents. My God blessed me with these children and I see it as an honor, a privledge to have a love so deep as the loving of your own children can be. It is my job to protect them until they can protect themselves. As parents, it is OUR JOB to prepare our children for the cruel and scary world that awaits them. It is our job to teach them respect and right from wrong. It is our job to "train them up in the way they should go..."  It is my job to love these children unconditionally. I didn't say like them unconditionally, because, well sometimes that is just impossible! But to love them. Love them despite their faults, despite their failures, despite their accidents, despite their differences. To really love them in the good, the bad, the ugly.  We are to love as God loves us. He loves us despite it all.

I just pray that we can give them that godly foundation that they deserve. I often pray for the tools of parenting that no book can give me. I often pray for guidance in parenting. And I always find myself asking, "Lord, help ME to be a better parent."

I now think that with this "happening" that boiled up such emotion within my mothering soul behind me; I can look into the further with better understand of how to deal with myself when it happens again, and unfortunately, it will happen again.